Triple M Music Jury Dismissed

In a stunning about-face the judge residing over the Get This murder trial has dismissed members of the Triple M Music Jury. At 9 am yesterday the judge ordered the removal of jury foreman Wayne “Hando” Hando after hearing strong allegations that “Hando” Hando had been taking bribes from the Nickelback fan club and had spent seven years serving as a cadet in the Kiss Army.

The Judge, Brian Jonestown of the Massacre Supreme Court, made his decision in closed chambers, offered no explanation when he announced the ruling in open court then sealed the record that holds the discussion and notes surrounding the decision.

“Hando” Hando is in his mid-forties, has extensive experience in the building industry and had a penchant for eating KFC zinger wings throughout the trial. “Hando” Hando is the third person to be dismissed from the jury since the murder trial of Get This, just under two years old, began five weeks ago.

The dismissal of “Hando” Hando follows the removal on Tuesday of Mike “Frangers” Franger, who was dismissed for engaging in undisclosed misconduct. Legal experts said they suspected that “Frangers” Franger, who is 35 to 45 years old, might have done some of his own research, which could have involved a number of possibilities, including listening to credible music programming on both Triple R and PBS community radio stations in Melbourne.

Dismissal of the three jury members has seen a controversial shift in music programming throughout the 2-4 pm time slot. Songs from Lou Reed’s legendary Transformer album and cult hits from Britpop pioneers The Members have recently been heard.

Triple M Program Director Guy “Dobson” Dobson has found the process tumultuous. “Dobson” Dobson says: “These are confusion times for us at Austereo. It has been chaorific, we prefer our music bland-on-bland - not something for enjoyancing.”

Pearls of Wisdom

In this article Austereo's program director Guy Dobson suggests that Tony Martin's very funny two hour ratings winner Get This may still be in with a chance. Whether Martin wants to continue with Triple M is another matter.

Dobson also talks up the Melbourne breakfast crew for 2008, Pete "Laughs on Me" Hellier and Myf Warhurst.

"There was a great deal of chemistry when we met with Myf," he says. "She'll certainly pass the muster on air. There was total relatability (sic)."

Intrigued by Dobson's free form use of the English language I tracked him down to learn more.*

L: You have said that on meeting Myf Warhurst that there was "total relatability". What does that mean?

GD: What do you think it means? Of course it means that we could relate to her. There was an affinitivity between us.

L: An affinitivity?

GD: Yes, we feel she brings a connectionitive spirit and is identifising for our target audience. Look Woman, don't you get it?

L: Did you just call me "Woman"?

GD: Of course not, I'm not racist.

L: I'm interested to know your thoughts on the Get This team.

GD: Well, they are certainly very enthusiastical which we like. But at times they have displayed just too much tangentialness.

L: I see. There has been some discussion that you didn't like Ed Kavalee's digs at other Austereo team members. What's the problem there?

GD: Three words: Got. Cha. Calls.

L: And Tony Martin has been critical of the Triple M playlist?

GD: I admit that I don't like the way Tony displays such judgementalness towards our playlist and his claims that the playlist is limited is unfair.

L: How would you describe your playlist?

GD: It's very diversic, it's Nickelbackian and Wang Chungified; you can't get better than that.

L: Thank you for your time.

* Or perhaps I just made it up.

The Ladies' Lounge #1 with George McEncroe, The Cage, Triple M, Brisbane

We're keen on celebrating women in the media here at re: soundings so we invite you into The Ladies' Lounge. Our first guest is George McEncroe from The Cage, Brisbane's breakfast radio show on Triple M. George co-hosts the show with three blokes: Marto, Sully and Ian Skippen. Please make here feel very welcome, George McEncroe...

*applause*

Welcome to the Ladies' Lounge. Would you like a pikelet?

Thanks for having me. Love your pikelets.

You came to stand-up, in your thirties and with four kids under your belt. What took you so long?

I took a long time to work up the guts to do stand up. Four kids can take your life from being just sad to being a sad joke and that's when it clicked. And I had to go through being a teacher, nurse, ethicist and human rights worker to get the material to make the gags. Yeah but mostly I was gutless.

You were quickly snapped up by the Austereo network. How did you make the move?

Yes it was a very lucky break. I had two influential people mention my name to the boss at Austereo on the same day and he decided he had to meet me. It was very much a case of having good friends helping me out. And being outrageously talented at the same time of course.

You're a Melbourne lass who's been part of The Cage Brisbane on Triple M for two years. Where feels like home to you these days?

I love Brisbane and before living there I had no idea of how physically beautiful it was. Having kids at the local school helped us become part of a community quite quickly but all our family are from Melbourne so I guess Melbourne will always feel more home like.

Like most women on-air, the rest of your team are men. Do you ever wish there were more chicks to chat to?

One day sisters we will rise and it'll be two women on air and two blokes and Oh My God yes. I wish there were more women to talk to in both programme directing roles, management everywhere. One day there might even be two ladeeeeeze just doing a show without anyone making a huge fuss about them being ladeeeeze. They might just be seen as funny humans.

Would a token gay, like Adam Richard do?

I don't like token anythings.

We're crazy for your daily blog. Blogging is becoming more popular with radio hosts but you've been banging yours out for quite awhile. How did it come about?

After much discussion about the various talents on the team we decided I should utilise my writing ability and the blog was born. I love it and never have to worry about what I am going to say. The blog is like the Magic Pudding it just keeps renewing itself. At 7am daily you can tune in to hear stuff wot I reckon about the world.

You talk and write a lot about your husband and kids. Do you think when your kids get older they will want to stab you with a knife?

Wanting to stab your parents with a knife is a crucial developmental stage and I would hate to deny my children that opportunity. And as I say to them...If you don't want me to talk about you stop being so darn hilarious. Just can't wait for them to hit puberty. The first period will make a GREAT blog. Ok yes I invade their privacy and exploit their innocence for ratings but hey...that's life. I mean I'm not putting them to work in a sweat shop despite the fact they do wonderful bead work. Lucky lucky bastards.

Do you have any radio heroes?

I don't really have heroes but I do love my on air colleagues (most of the time) and I reckon Tony and Ed on Get This are pretty damn fine. Tony Martin is as close to a radio genius as you can get. I have always admired Kate Langbroek for her insisting on being herself (harder than it sounds) and Judith Lucy with Kaz Cooke was a rare treat.

Austereo really copped a lashing in Judith Lucy's comedy show, "I Failed". Do you think she failed?

I don't think Jude failed. Warm, funny brave people can't fail.

Have you ever been given feedback from your bosses such as "Our research shows that our audience HATE you"? Discuss.

Yes I have been told that our male listeners aren't always so thrilled with me but I am there to talk about the world as I see it...not as some blokes would like me to see it. So it's not surprising. Always hurtful sure...but not unexpected.

You've featured in a Where's Wally promotion , frequently co-host Get This with Tony Martin and did a stint on Fox breakfast in Melbourne. What is Austereo going to get you to do next?

I think Austereo would like me to keep performing solidly and consistently and to eat fewer chips, especially on air. Beyond that I have no idea.

Recently you've been popping up on the telly on Spicks and Specks. Would you like to get your noggin on the tube more or less than Fifi Box?

Love doing a bit of tele. Spicks and Specks was top fun. As for my dear friend and colleague Fifi Box I don't see any need to compare the two of us. She is young and pretty and sweet. I am old and cranky and rather mean. Tele is good and yes I'd like to do more of it. Bless the edit.

I saw your husband drinking an icy cold can of coke at the train station. Was that your influence?

Sam has always loved coke. He's just not so keen on wiping down the kitchen bench and I seem to have no influence there.

In your very pleasant daydreams what are you going to do next?

In my most pleasant day dreams I am sitting on a hill side somewhere in northern NSW with a view to the Pacific Ocean writng a wonderful book.

We're all about celebrating wymmyn here at the Ladies' Lounge. What's your celebrity tip for keeping a happy home when you have to get up at 4.30 am?

I wish I could sleep till 4.30 am. I am up at 3.30 and there is no way to keep a happy home when you are that tired. Keep your head just above the shit line is my advice. Stay fit. Drink less and be rid of people who make you feel anxious or sad.

George, your producer has met with foul play. You are given free reign to produce today's show. What do you do, play, change?

If I had to put together a whole show at short notice I would panic. Then cry. Then panic some more and then call every person I thought was funny or interesting for a chat. There'd be less Chisel and more Gillian Welch and possibly quite a bit of nonsense about people only I knew. Maybe not a brilliant show for anyone to listen to but by golly I'd have a ball. In fact the idea is so much fun I might just go and kill my producer right now. Thanks for the idea pet.

We're mad for you here at re:soundings can we be blog sisters? We'll have to rub our hardwires together or something. Will you come back and have a shandy with us some other time?

Would love to return for a shandy one day.

Read George's blog here

George can be heard on The Cage, Brisbane from 5.30 - 9am Weekdays
Podcast

Occasional guest host on Get This

Austereo's Where's Wally Game Promotion

Thanks to our favourite gossip site Defamer for pointing us towards Austereo's latest media campaign. Check it here.

Yes, it is a Where's Wally Game but instead of looking for the bespectacled nerd in a stripey shirt you get to search for their "BIG NAMES". There's even a legend at the bottom just in case you have never heard of their "BIG NAMES".

But surely a golden opportunity was missed when they decided to have the Tony Martin of Get This fame cartoon character dressed in a blue shirt and brown pants - wasn't he a monty for the role of Wally?

Perhaps this is just the first step in Austereo's campaign. Still to come:

• "Where's our ratings?" Pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey style party game.
• "Where's Fifi Box?" Sticker book featuring map of Australian media and 973 stickers of Fifi. Logies, Dancing with the Stars, Thank God You're Here, Mick Molloy's new political panel show - everyone needs a token female - whack a sticker of Fifi anywhere you can!
• "Kyle Sandilands Action Figure" Comes complete with pins and voodoo instruction kit.